Three years ago, I wrote a blog post about my commute to work on my bike. This was three jobs ago, and now I find myself making the same commute down the same roads, but to a new destination. And this time, I’m on an e-bike!
After being laid off twice within a 6-month period, and operating my own small clinic for over a year, I am now working at a place that’s around the corner from my old job. I’m at an assisted living facility, where most of my patients are in their 80s and 90s. And I am absolutely loving it there.
The pace at my old jobs in the outpatient ortho world was fast and furious, with patients arriving every 30-40 min, and administrators who wanted me billing as much as ethically possible with each one before passing them off to an aide and starting the next person. I had to be ready to go by 7am or earlier, because we needed to capture patients before their work day started, and I usually worked 10-hr days so we could make it easy for folks to come in after work as well. I often felt rushed, frazzled, and unable to give the full quality attention and care I would like to give had I more time. Patients themselves were often stressed from missing work or normal activities due to their injury, and worried about their, at times, massively high co-pays. I had folks who would have benefited from weeks or months of therapy ask me to give them a home program and let them go off on their own since they couldn’t afford more than one visit.
Now, I don’t start seeing patients until 9am because none of them want to get up any earlier. I’m done by 4:30 at the absolute latest, since that’s when they start serving dinner. I get one hour to work with each patient. The pace is very relaxed, as many of them are deconditioned and fatigue quickly and require many rest breaks during the course of treatment. We sit and chat while they rest until they are ready to continue. I get to inquire about their lives, their travels, their successes and their families. I’ve heard amazing stories from some truly impressive people! And the cranky ones inwardly crack me up and don’t offend me at all.
Being around all these people who are nearing the end of their time on this planet is actually quite invigorating. I find myself more aware of my mortality and the briefness of life, and am inspired to make the most of my time. I appreciate seeing what matters to folks after making it this far in life, and am relieved to discover that dress size and productive hours logged are not so highly valued. There’s a gal I work with who loves watching the birds out her window, and was still reveling at a particularly beautiful golden finch she saw days later. The slow pace, the little joys, meals and relationships – that’s what seem to win out in the end.
I find myself moving more slowly around my house, no longer taking the stairs two at a time, but slowing down and soaking up every moment. I’ve been better at stopping and really engaging with my kids on the days I’m home. I am watching them more closely, marveling at their growing minds and imaginations. I am quicker to laugh and much slower to overbook our schedules. Sitting on the swing in the backward while they play feels like the biggest parenting win.
Best of all, I basically have 30 Grandmas now. The role of the grandparent is to be the uber-supportive, delusionally proud, relentless cheerleader in their grandkid’s lives. I start every single work day off with the same patient who covers me with praise and admiration each day. She is the sweetest woman, and she has pretty severe dementia and doesn’t remember lavishing the same compliments on me just days prior. I get to start each day off with a big ego boost from a truly grateful woman. It is delightful.
I can’t help but laugh at the irony as I ride my bike in to work each morning. When I was at my old job, I was burnt out and barely even realized it. I was coasting and losing empathy, and had lost my vigor for my field. After getting laid off, and certainly while running my own business, my passion reignited and my empathy swelled. Now, I no longer feel burnt out but feel helpful, needed, appreciated and even loved at my job, and my bike ride is literally one hundred times easier. I approach that old hill that used to make me question whether I shouldn’t probably take the car every time, and I cackle obnoxiously as I motor up at 20mph on my fancy e-bike.
The hill has been conquered, and life is feeling good.
This Joyful, Messy Life 